Dear Windows 8.1:

You are undoubtedly better than your immediate predecessor, and your level of sophistication blows my old Windows XP operating system right out of deep sea waters. But you perplex me with your endless array of Apps and your promises that my life can’t help but be enhanced with their use.

Your interface stymies me and I am no novice PC user. I know I will figure you out in a matter of weeks and we may then become good friends despite all the consternation you’ve caused me.

But for now I treat you as my Maltese poodle treats chipmunks. I will sneak up on you and try to overcome you before you have a chance to outsmart me. My Sydney hasn’t yet outrun one of those speediest of rodents. You might want to hope for a similar fortune.

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